Programmers Don‘t Have to be Socially Awkward. Here Are 10 Social Skills To Improve Your Career.

The stereotypical image of a programmer is a nerdy loner who‘s brilliant with computers but awkward with people. Think Dennis Nedry from Jurassic Park, bungling his social interactions as much as he later bungles his attempt to steal the dinosaur embryos.

But this stereotype is outdated and inaccurate. While some programmers may be less outgoing than others, the idea that coding and social skills are mutually exclusive is a myth. In reality, having strong interpersonal skills is becoming increasingly crucial for success as a software developer.

The growing importance of social skills in programming

In the early days of computing, software development was often a solitary activity. A lone programmer could disappear into a room for days and emerge with a complete program. But those days are long gone.

Modern programming is a team sport. The vast majority of developers work on collaborative teams, according to a 2018 Stack Overflow survey. A mere 7.2% of respondents said they work alone. Working effectively with others is now an essential part of the job.

What‘s more, the work of programming involves much more than just writing code. A study by InfoQ found that developers spend over half (53%) of their time on non-coding activities like collaborating with coworkers, answering emails, and attending meetings.

Even when they are coding, programmers must consider their human users and teammates. Developers need to create intuitive interfaces, write clear documentation, and format their code to be easily understood by other programmers who may work on it in the future.

The rise of Agile development methodologies has also increased the importance of social skills. Agile places a high value on face-to-face communication, collaboration, and rapid feedback cycles – all of which require interpersonal finesse.

Studies have shown a significant correlation between a programmer‘s social skills and their job performance. A study published in the journal ACM Computing Surveys found that "soft skills" like communication and collaboration were just as important as technical skills in determining a software developer‘s effectiveness.

Another study published in the journal Empirical Software Engineering found that developers with stronger social skills earned higher salaries and were more likely to be promoted into leadership roles.

Clearly, the myth of the socially inept programmer is just that – a myth. In the modern world of software development, having strong interpersonal skills is not optional. It‘s a must-have.

So what specific social skills do programmers need to thrive in their careers? Here are 10 of the most important skills to develop:

1. Clear communication

Programmers need to be able to explain complex technical concepts in plain language that non-technical colleagues and clients can understand. They also need to be able to communicate clearly in writing, in everything from code comments to user manuals.

Writing understandable code is an often overlooked form of communication. A survey of over 300 developers found that "understandable code" was rated as the second most important factor in code quality, just behind "bug free code". Writing clear, well-documented code is an act of communication with your future self and other programmers who will maintain your code.

2. Active listening

Effective coders listen more than they talk. They ask clarifying questions to make sure they truly understand a problem before trying to solve it. Miscommunication is behind many a failed software project.

Active listening ensures you‘re solving the right problem and reduces the need for expensive rework later. A study by researchers at the University of Hamburg found that active listening was the #1 most important communication skill for software developers.

3. Collaboration

Teamwork makes the dream work in software development. Most modern programming projects are far too complex for a single developer to complete alone. Being able to work effectively with others is essential.

Good collaborators build trust, communicate openly, and consider multiple perspectives. They‘re also willing to have hard conversations and deal with conflict directly. A case study published by IEEE found that programmers who collaborated more frequently produced higher quality code with fewer defects.

4. Networking

Having a strong professional network benefits programmers in many ways. Your network can help you find mentors, learn about new technologies, and discover job opportunities.

Networking doesn‘t have to be awkward or transactional. Focus on building genuine relationships by attending industry events, participating in online forums, and offering help to others when you can. A survey by LinkedIn found that 85% of jobs are filled via networking.

5. Giving and receiving feedback

Software development involves constant feedback, from code reviews to performance evaluations. Being able to give and receive constructive feedback is a key skill.

When giving feedback, balance positive comments with specific suggestions for improvement. When receiving tough feedback, resist the urge to get defensive. Ask clarifying questions and look for lessons you can learn. A study by the Society for Human Resource Management found that employees who receive regular feedback are 3 times more engaged than those who receive feedback once a year or less.

6. Conflict resolution

Disagreements are normal and healthy on development teams. Skilled programmers address conflict directly rather than avoiding or escalating it. They focus on issues, not personalities, and look for win-win solutions.

Learning to navigate conflict in a professional, productive way will serve you well as you advance in your career. A study by researchers at the University of Ottawa found that software development teams with effective conflict management had higher levels of trust, collaboration, and ultimately produced higher quality software.

7. Empathy

Empathy is the ability to understand and share the feelings of another. For programmers, this means being able to see a problem from the user‘s perspective, anticipate how changes in the codebase might affect teammates, and generally be attuned to the human impact of your work.

Empathetic programmers build software that‘s more intuitive and user-friendly. They also tend to be better teammates and leaders. Research has shown that empathy is a key component of emotional intelligence, which is a stronger predictor of leadership performance than IQ.

8. Leadership

Leadership is not about titles or authority. It‘s about influence, initiative, and setting a positive example for others to follow. Even early-career programmers can demonstrate leadership by taking ownership of their work, mentoring junior teammates, and always bringing their best effort.

Developing leadership skills early will serve you well as you progress into senior technical and management roles. A 2020 Stack Overflow survey found that over 40% of developers want to be in a leadership role within five years.

9. Adaptability

The only constant in the tech industry is change. Programming languages, tools, and best practices are always evolving. What was cutting-edge last year may be obsolete next year.

To thrive in this environment, programmers need to be flexible and embrace continuous learning. Adaptable coders are curious, open-minded, and see change as an opportunity rather than a threat. A study by McKinsey found that adaptability was one of the top skills that differentiated high-performing teams during the pandemic.

10. Business acumen

Finally, having a basic understanding of business is becoming increasingly important for programmers, especially those who want to advance into leadership roles. Knowing how your company operates, makes money, and defines success will help you make better decisions and create more value in your role.

You don‘t need an MBA, but you should understand your company‘s business model, competitive landscape, and strategic priorities. Aim to see the bigger picture beyond the codebase. One study found that companies that aligned their IT departments with overall business strategy significantly outperformed their competitors.

Putting it into practice

If you‘re a programmer looking to boost your interpersonal skills, start by picking one or two areas to focus on. If communication is a growth area for you, make an effort to write clearer emails or practice explaining technical concepts to non-technical colleagues. If you struggle with public speaking, join a group like Toastmasters to practice in a safe environment.

Remember, social skills are just that – skills. Like any skill, they can be learned and improved with practice and repetition. Don‘t put pressure on yourself to transform overnight. Small, consistent efforts will compound over time.

It may feel uncomfortable at first, especially if you‘re naturally introverted. But stretch yourself outside your comfort zone. With time and practice, what once felt awkward will start to feel natural.

Realize too that you don‘t have to change your personality or suddenly become the most outgoing person in the room. Introverts bring many strengths to the table, like deep thinking, active listening, and written communication skills. The goal is not to change who you are, but to build on your natural strengths and round out your skillset.

Conclusion: The well-rounded programmer

In today‘s world, being a great programmer is about more than just being a great coder. It‘s about being a great collaborator, communicator, and leader. Technical skills will get your foot in the door, but interpersonal skills will open new doors in your career.

The most successful programmers are those who can not only solve complex technical problems, but also work effectively with other human beings. By developing the social skills covered in this article, you‘ll be well on your way to becoming a more well-rounded, impactful, and valuable member of your team.

So don‘t buy into the myth of the socially awkward programmer. Embrace the fact that social skills are a critical part of your job, and commit to continuous improvement just as you do with your technical abilities. Your career – and your team – will thank you.